For several days, I have not slept well due to increased pain. I had a call yesterday from a counselor friend of mine checking in with me. I had not written on this blog much and really most do not know the true reason I stopped. I would share it, but to share the reason would give validity to nonexistent boundaries.
I am giving no one or nothing any validity who has tried to demonize my writings or felt offended. We humans are easy to judge when we should be looking at ourselves instead. This is my life and I own it. My family has always been my world and I have always put them above me and many times I have put my friends above me.
Last night I was asked by a new friend, do you love yourself? I could not answer. It made me sad that I did not have enough respect and love for me. The good news I realized God loves and I could work on loving myself more and understanding whose I AM.
In the meantime- through tears because of physical pain, I shot these photos in the rain in my backyard. Don’t worry- I am seeing my doctors to help me with the chronic and acute discomforts I have. Just making it real. Be looking soon for photography from Hawaii where I will be taking in some much needed sun! I am not a tourist type so you will not find those kind of shots on my blog as I believe vacation is not about rushing from one tourist activity to another. Instead you will see photos through the eyes of randomness of what I enjoy on The Sandwich Islands. I lived there and seen a lot already, but I bet my new camera just might find a cool surfer dude to photograph! Yes. I am back looking at mens’ butts.