I Stopped My World

My writing table evokes creativity. 

I stopped my world yesterday.  It was a simple thing.  First, I started my day cooking a meal for my autistic son.  Driving it to his apartment to the delight of his feasting eyes on homemade chicken tenders was so worth it.  Shortly a new job coach arrived to Luke’s home.  We are hoping to increase Luke’s structured employment or volunteer  hours in the community.  The meeting went well.

Luke and I said our goodbyes with him yelling, “Mom give me a hug,”  as a big burley bear hug was coming my way.  Having those big broad shoulders and his arms around my frame always brings a smile to me.  Slamming the door shut to his apartment while I stand there is his way to show the finality of the moment.  There is no lingering for him which is pretty typical as we say our goodbyes to ‘normal’ family or friends.  It is pretty funny and I am used to it.  Autism brings on new adventures and this is just one.

I started my car and drove off  for a visit with my girlfriend and her first grandchild.  Arriving to a beautiful home overlooking the emerald waters on the north end of the  puget sound,  I was greeted with grandpapa and grandma taking turns holding the new baby and loving on her.  Her sparkling and alert blue eyes staring with wonderment at her grandpa was completely mesmerizing.  It stopped me in my tracks and my world yesterday.  It brought me to a tender place and let me let go of everything except for this moment. 

I had not planned to spend a majority of my day with a baby as I had many things I needed to get done, but I just could not bring myself to leave.  It ended up being good for me and such a wonderment.  We all need to be reminded of the miracle of life.  It seemed to be what I needed and wanted more than anything else right at that very minute.  I held a new baby,  but she held me and gave me time to process and contemplate the motivations of my heart and the goals I intended to consider over the next week or perhaps the next month.  Family and friends look deep within and make sure your priorities are in check.  Always look toward the right side of your mental health and what you may need right now.  For me, it was holding a little baby and mind you this is usually not like me so I am so glad I listened deep within my soul and I stopped my world even if just for half a day.