Cancer

Recently at my last appointment at the VA , I met this amazing character actor Arlen Dean Snyder from the film Heartbreak Ridge. Photo courtesy of IMDb.

The Today Show has one of my favorite weatherman Al Roker who was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer. As a familiar face on television, he has actively decided to educate the public and bring awareness. Mr. Roker’s doctor opted to do a biopsy. The pathology report showed an aggressive prostate cancer and he will need surgery.

Last November in 2019, I reported to my family physician with the VA a worrisome spot on my face under my eye. Being suspicious, I looked up the best surgical dermatologist in Seattle. In documented emails discussing back and forth almost begging my doctor , I requested this specialist. The only thing she offered was a picture taken of my face. In December of 2019 that photo of my skin lesion was read to be benign.

Again, I asked to have it taken off and I was made to feel like I wanted a face lift. This was very disturbing to me so I made a decision to go to a civilian surgeon. Unfortunately because of COVID, my surgery was not until July, 2020 and by this time the suspicious mole had grown four times its size since December of 2019. The good news was the specimen was taken to pathology to be read and I went home to heal.

For two months into the second week of September, I slowly mended. Never hearing from my doctor, I thought I dodged a bullet.  Starting to receive my bills for this surgery I called the billing offices. I mentioned to the billing personnel never being notified of my pathology report. She stated staff would call. Soon my phone rang and the nurse gives me the shocking news. “I am sorry to say your path report was scanned into your chart and it was missed. You have cancer.”

Shockingly I responded, “You are kidding me, right. How could you guys do this?”

As I hung up my phone, the anger was setting in as I had to go back to square one with the VA and get the doctor I originally requested. It has taken the VA system another two months to get me into this specialist and finally on Monday I will have an extensive surgical procedure to clean out the cancer and work on getting clear margins with plastic surgery if needed.

As a highly energized advocate for myself, but falling through the cracks at every turn has become like PTSD. Their were a number of doctors involved in my cluster of poor care and a VA system that is slow and not conducive to timeliness. I am not writing this to blame anyone as that is apparent there is enough blame to go around. Rather this should be looked at as a system’s failure along with physician’s fatigue syndrome ( lack of a better term).

I do not know if this is a volume and processing issue in the VA system keeping up with the soldiers’ care, but this was important for me to share with you as it is something that we can and should do better.

Think of me next Monday as I have more surgery and thanks to Al Roker for being public. It has given me some courage to do the same about my cancer. The wounds I have carried throughout my life are deep, but it does not mean I should not share with my readers. I need you guys ever more praying and sending healing thoughts.

Meeting the actor Arlen Dean Snyder at the VA was a lot of fun. This is a really nice guy.

 

 

 

How Did We Get Here?

March 3, 2020:

“How did we get here?” My mind wandering in disbelief as two men cough near by.

“COVID I will not panic, but you got my attention.”  Then another person sneezes.

My name shows up on the computer screen indicating my meds are ready.  Going to the window the distressed lady shouts out to me,

“Look at the spit all over my window.  We have two Coronavirus patients in the ER and my family just called me and said don’t come home.”

What is home anyway? Is it as safe as you think if you’re not invited any longer?

 

Berlin: Who Are You?

Thirty years ago Berlin’s wall came down.  I was working in Germany when that happened from 1989-1992.  After a nightshift at the military hospital, I went home to watch the news on the Armed Forces Network.  It seemed surreal to visualize the East Germans and many others excitedly chiseling the stone wall away!

On my recent trip to Berlin, it was with the wall in mind that I began another day exploring my mother’s hometown.   In my last post , I gave the tip to spend at least two days in the Mitte area.  Tip two is to look at Berlin through the eyes of history.

I Stopped My World

My writing table evokes creativity. 

I stopped my world yesterday.  It was a simple thing.  First, I started my day cooking a meal for my autistic son.  Driving it to his apartment to the delight of his feasting eyes on homemade chicken tenders was so worth it.  Shortly a new job coach arrived to Luke’s home.  We are hoping to increase Luke’s structured employment or volunteer  hours in the community.  The meeting went well.

Sunsets: Don’t Under Estimate Them!

It gets old driving up to the Veteran’s Administration Hospital, but at least the sunset was beautiful on the water.  Wishing I could turn toward the ocean and cast my gaze on the sea sounded so much better than standing in line at the pharmacy.

My Mind Is Parked, But The Chocolate Is Kicking In

6/2/1977…I read this in my junior high school yearbook and smiled.

6/2/2019….When he was put in a critical thinking scenario, the whistling began as a coping mechanism. The subject was unpleasant so he was attempting to birdcall it off.

The Blog Who Became A Book

 

Alesia is Seeing Green in her garden!

Sitting out in my garden this afternoon on a beautiful Saturday with bright blue skies, I brought out a new book to enjoy reading.  This book is very special to me and if you are a gardener you might want to think about picking it up on Blurb printing.  I am thrilled today to share my friend and fellow blogger Kevin G. Loud’s book Seeing Green.

The Organized Writer

You ever wonder what the most touching blog posts are written about especially those that always bring back your audience for more? By having a blog and developing a number of readers over the years who have in many instances stayed in touch with me through email, Instagram, or Facebook , I have found that my platform strategy in writing is utilizing my personal life experiences.  For example, I have worked over the years to deliver topics around my son Luke who has autism and the many struggles that have followed us through various experiences.

The Ferry

The leaves had turned and within six weeks Christmas would have come and gone. Rolling my suitcase off the bus toward the slippery Seattle street in good spirits, my eyes glistening with excitement, I focused on the ocean within my view. After all it was Thanksgiving and my friend promised a wonderful meal for the holidays. What she would do for me is what I had done for her over the years, as my memories conjured up my kitchen with savory smells that my taste buds couldn’t wait for again.

Manhandling my heavy luggage, staring at the lights dancing off the buildings near the Puget Sound’s emerald waters, I could see the Bremerton Ferry awaiting for me. I arrived a couple of hours early bought my fare and rested on a construction site zone bench, where waiting for my friend to arrive was my goal.

Time went by rapidly, but it had been some time before I heard from her and all to knowing work at the hospital was the culprit. Not a surprise and it did not bother me in the least.

The ferry dock information lady stared at me as I asked her a question.

“Where is the best clam chowder?”

Undeniably she said pointing to Ivars, “right there!”

Yes. Of course.

Suitcase in tow, I decided best to get a bite. It was a good thing as my two hour wait turned to four. What was so interesting besides being physically tired, I enjoyed every minute of that beautiful scenery as dark got darker and the afternoon turned to evening.

It was late, but she arrived and off we went from the ferry to her car parked on the other side of the sound. Driving those dark roads, we reminisced of days gone by and how we both loved the tall pine and fir trees in our view as we weaved the curved asphalt road. I was mesmerized by this part of earth I call home. Yet a part of me was lonely. It was my first Thanksgiving without my sons in 25 years.

When we arrived at my girlfriend’s home, she announced,

“Would you be OK if we have our Thanksgiving meal on Friday?”

Studying her tired face and all to knowing that feeling I made sure to remind her the most important part of hanging out was that we weren’t alone. She smiled and agreed.

Long before she and I would find ourselves together this night, I could not help to think long before in the heavenly it was decided how we would be a help to each other in the present. No Thanksgiving meal on the actual holiday, but my day would not be spent alone and the ferry made sure of that.

A Mother’s Emotional Challenges Dealing With Her Autistic Son

Having an adult son with autism has hard and complicating challenges.  My first time hearing Luke’s diagnosis in 1994 made me numb.  It did not seem real.