Category Archives: Memoirs

Living In A Bubble

A man chooses to walk out in a dangerous area of the North shore of Oahu.

I live in a bubble at times.  We all do.  It’s human nature.  Reflecting about my time in Hawaii makes me feel free in my spirit and safe. I love tropical climates. I am sure the fact I lived here for several years attributes to these feelings. In the above photo, I enjoyed viewing this man who seemed to feel free getting close to the waves. Water is peaceful even when we know it’s dangerous…


Stumbling along in this life is not what we were intended to do.  We have purpose.  When given the opportunity ,  I can feel music in my body and dance the night away. 

I have done that . Those nights of dancing  can be so much fun. I am in control and enjoy myself in the rhythm. Music can control the mind. I wonder how much fun this surfer was experiencing on his longboard as he allowed the waves to control him as he surfed the direction the ocean was taking him. 


Our mental state can take over our physical state.  For example, if we hurt ( brain talking to us) we may take a pill to help this brain state.  My chronic pain was so much better in the warm climate . 

Enjoying Hawaii is always a spiritual uplifting experience for me. Hawaii is a benchmark for me getting in touch with my spiritual self.


It’s amazing to me when folks argue that their conscious can not accept faith or theology. The idea of science enters the picture and is integral to mankind , but it can not explain my conscious state nor yours. It just can not know the subjective.


We human persons are more than the sum of our parts.  We have spirits that have the ability to think , feel, and can make conscious decisions. Respecting each other’s  life decisions may mean we need to climb out of our bubble once in awhile.  I know I do. Do you?  Living in pain chronically makes me think on spiritual ideals as this post conveys.  So much crisis and turmoil fill up our world these days. Sometimes removing our bubble can bring clarity.  

Credit: google and the others pictures were taken solely by Alesiablogs

How You Made Me Feel

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This photo was taken the day before we got our first snow here in Seattle.  It has been freezing ever sense..Brrrrrrrrrr

Do you remember that first love?  Sadly many of us have been burnt in our first ever love experiences.  There is no way to define in human standards how love looks from one individual to another.

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25th Anniversary

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It doesn’t surprise me that I would think of my wedding day even though I am not in that relationship anymore. It was a two decade relationship and will be a lasting impression on my soul and spirit.

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Go On Now

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There is old time history in those Kentucky hills.  If one is lucky enough, you might hear of it told in a story or two by your kinfolk.

“Go on now, help me get my shoes off,”  in distress papaw asked the girls.

Jeanette unlaced her grandfather’s left boot and June the right.  They tugged until the boots fell to the wood floor.

Mama knew her daddy was short of breath.  Her girls were too young to understand, but they knew something was not right.  Jack was even younger at 9 years.

Mama secretly told Willie her husband to go on now to a neighbor’s home to call the doctor. He returned shortly never making that phone call.  Willie had heard the dinner bell rung by mama.  It was the S.O.S. that her daddy was gone.

My Dad's first cousin pointed out to me where papaw's farmhouse used to set.

My Dad’s first cousin pointed out to me where papaw’s farmhouse used to set.

Night before last, the family had went down to papaw’s house to visit.  Papaw said he was not feeling well. For the first time ever, he decided to spend the night at his daughter’s home.  Little Jack strolled alone with grandpa back to his parent’s farm after the rest of the family had left to go back early.  Jack loved Papaw.  He knew Papaw always had a good story to tell.  That day, he did not know that it would be his last he was to hear.

Stories and long tales are family favorites of mine.  Some of them are sad, but more often there is a good laugh to be had by all.  Jack was my dad.  The girls were my aunts.

Recently on a trip back to Kentucky, I had the opportunity to attend my family reunion and my Aunt Jeanette’s 90th birthday party which just so happened to fall on the same day.

I was able to shock my Aunt coming in from Seattle.  I kept it a secret.

I was able to shock my Aunt coming in from Seattle. I kept it a secret.

I was able to visit the family farms and see the old cemetery that dates back to my four times great grandfather.  He is buried way back in the tall trees far from anyone.

This map is from public records showcasing the farm highlighted in blue with the number 62-37 77-9.  You can see open fields, but in those woods is where the cemetery actually has our ancestors.

This map is from public records showcasing the farm highlighted in blue with the number 62-37 77-9. You can see open fields, but in those woods is where the cemetery actually has our ancestors.

Three years prior to this visit, the cemetery was cleaned up.  This time I saw the place after very little work had been done to it.   I thought I would share in pictures a bit of what I saw along with a story that makes us all wonder about what it must have been like growing up on a farm. You see 911 was just not available and as a matter of fact many of these farms still have no 911 addresses attached to them.  It is as if time stands still when you think about it.  But we all know that is not true.

In the next few days I will be writing about the adventures involved in finding the exact location of the cemetery.  Public records do not include the cemetery notated when I made reference to it with the folks who hold this information in the courthouse.

In the woods leading to the cemetery, we found critters and many dangerous plants such as these. Do you know what they are?

In the woods leading to the cemetery, we found critters and many dangerous plants such as these. Do you know what these plants are?

This story is dedicated to all fathers.  Happy Father’s Day Jack ( in Heaven otherwise known as Randall by some, Bill by others, and daddy by me).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Finding Luke


It was 1999 and we lost track of our six year old autistic son Luke.  Prior to this, our church service had just ended.  Luke just began walking and our youngest son was two years old.

The church we attended at the time was meeting in an old building.  My husband got Luke from Sunday School and I went to get our baby.

At some point, Luke wandered off and we went on a wild goose chase looking for him. I was panicked to say the least.

Everyone was leaving the church , except for a few concerned parishioners. It was the craziest feeling not knowing where our son disappeared to.

The church had an old attic that was used for sound checks. It was accessed by a pull out ladder. At some point it was shut, but we kept running around yelling, “Luke! Where are you?”It just did not make sense. 

All of a sudden, I could hear a distant whimper. To say the least a mother knows her child’s sounds. I scurried to have someone open the drop down ladder and low and behold there was our sweet Luke sitting in the dark.

I had not thought of this event for quite some time until I was told recently of the little autistic boy who lost his life after wandering off from his family in PA. These stories are hard to fathom, and even more to swallow.  Yet, we have to.  We have to remember how vulnerable our cognitively challenged society can be especially our children.    Searching for someone missing is a feeling I would not wish on anyone.  Anytime a person vanishes-tragedy can be right around the corner.

I hope this story shows how easy life can change in a heartbeat. In this case, it was a quiet sound of a whimper from my precious son.  It was just enough to help this mom find her beautiful little boy stuck in a dark, damp attic.  My heart still pounds pondering this event.  

Luke was held by me for many years until he learned to walk.  

 

Blindfolded: Easter During WWII-Part IV

World War II has been written about at length. However, when I started this series earlier in the year, I knew this slant would be very different than any written before.  I was given permission to share the love stories of the German war bride.

Our German War Bride

Our German War Bride

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Terror and Raids: WWII War Bride (Excerpt III)

The German soldier was on the left side whom received this war bride's letters.

The German soldier was on the left side whom received this war bride’s letters.

Sitting down slowly, the war bride dreamt of happier times. As she pulled out her pencil and paper from her desk, she felt herself lifting out of a fog. Perhaps it was for only a few minutes, but the letter writing allowed her to escape reality. It was so difficult tending to all aspects of running a household without her husband and father of her children present. Yet, she did it without complaining.
The process of pen to paper allowed her to feel her husband and to sense his presence. He was right by her side. Even if only for a short time it took to write the letter. The war bride needed this outlet. It was all she had.
The paper was placed on the table neatly. Pressed by her hands each fine sheet was straighten out. This gesture was done lovingly as if she were touching her husband’s own face with a tenderness that at times she was beginning to forget all too soon although never to admit out loud.

This excerpt was taken from January 19, 1942 in Potsdam. You can begin to catch a glimpse of some alarming events as the war bride moved to be near family as she was about to give birth to her second child.

(Historical facts about this time frame in the war was that the Germans were starting to deport Jews to concentration camps. Extermination of the captured was to follow rapidly. Also the first American forces were beginning to arrive in Europe on the Northern Ireland shores).

“My dearest Willy! Saturday I received your letter #4, that was my greatest Sunday pleasure. In your last letter you had several wishes….partly already taken care of. I have been able to get the soap holder with cover and for your shaving soap. A can opener and pocket calendar is yet to be found, but I think I can get a calendar tomorrow or day after. I cannot get Rosodont at all, we have not been able to get toothpaste for a long time. Knitted gloves I was able to find, but I cannot send any packages right now. Everything is blocked again, nothing goes through…”

In another section of this letter, “… . But since two days ago the trains were all blocked again. But maybe that only affects transport trains. Willy, listen, we have already used 51 P. from your small card. For 1 nightgown,30, and 21 for Opa’s pullover. If you need more later, we can use Opa’s allotment card for purchases. His P’s are usable only after February. Your allotment was 80, total. You bought boots? That is very important, it would be unthinkable if your feet would freeze…..”

In a final section we read, “….. Last night was Terror attack in Frankfurt. It was awesome outside, everything was lit up like daylight. But nothing happened here….I hope that times will change for the better soon and that you can come home to your family….”