Cancer

Recently at my last appointment at the VA , I met this amazing character actor Arlen Dean Snyder from the film Heartbreak Ridge. Photo courtesy of IMDb.

The Today Show has one of my favorite weatherman Al Roker who was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer. As a familiar face on television, he has actively decided to educate the public and bring awareness. Mr. Roker’s doctor opted to do a biopsy. The pathology report showed an aggressive prostate cancer and he will need surgery.

Last November in 2019, I reported to my family physician with the VA a worrisome spot on my face under my eye. Being suspicious, I looked up the best surgical dermatologist in Seattle. In documented emails discussing back and forth almost begging my doctor , I requested this specialist. The only thing she offered was a picture taken of my face. In December of 2019 that photo of my skin lesion was read to be benign.

Again, I asked to have it taken off and I was made to feel like I wanted a face lift. This was very disturbing to me so I made a decision to go to a civilian surgeon. Unfortunately because of COVID, my surgery was not until July, 2020 and by this time the suspicious mole had grown four times its size since December of 2019. The good news was the specimen was taken to pathology to be read and I went home to heal.

For two months into the second week of September, I slowly mended. Never hearing from my doctor, I thought I dodged a bullet.  Starting to receive my bills for this surgery I called the billing offices. I mentioned to the billing personnel never being notified of my pathology report. She stated staff would call. Soon my phone rang and the nurse gives me the shocking news. “I am sorry to say your path report was scanned into your chart and it was missed. You have cancer.”

Shockingly I responded, “You are kidding me, right. How could you guys do this?”

As I hung up my phone, the anger was setting in as I had to go back to square one with the VA and get the doctor I originally requested. It has taken the VA system another two months to get me into this specialist and finally on Monday I will have an extensive surgical procedure to clean out the cancer and work on getting clear margins with plastic surgery if needed.

As a highly energized advocate for myself, but falling through the cracks at every turn has become like PTSD. Their were a number of doctors involved in my cluster of poor care and a VA system that is slow and not conducive to timeliness. I am not writing this to blame anyone as that is apparent there is enough blame to go around. Rather this should be looked at as a system’s failure along with physician’s fatigue syndrome ( lack of a better term).

I do not know if this is a volume and processing issue in the VA system keeping up with the soldiers’ care, but this was important for me to share with you as it is something that we can and should do better.

Think of me next Monday as I have more surgery and thanks to Al Roker for being public. It has given me some courage to do the same about my cancer. The wounds I have carried throughout my life are deep, but it does not mean I should not share with my readers. I need you guys ever more praying and sending healing thoughts.

Meeting the actor Arlen Dean Snyder at the VA was a lot of fun. This is a really nice guy.

 

 

 

Sunsets: Don’t Under Estimate Them!

It gets old driving up to the Veteran’s Administration Hospital, but at least the sunset was beautiful on the water.  Wishing I could turn toward the ocean and cast my gaze on the sea sounded so much better than standing in line at the pharmacy.

Luke And Alesia

My friend from Kitsap texted me last night inquiring about my New Year festivity’s. I texted her back a photo exactly what I was doing at 8pm. I was standing in line at McDonald’s! Such excitement with my autistic son Luke, but when I look into his eyes I know exactly this moment here is where I belong.

What is Voluntary Placement?

My autistic son Luke was discharged recently after a month in a Washington State King County Evaluation and Treatment Center.  My understanding is these treatment centers are partially funded by the State of Washington.  They do short-stay commitments for clients who present with severe mental illness.  Luke has now returned to voluntary placement, although with extreme changes that include living in a hotel!

Autistic Son Discharged From Hospital

On 3/1/18, my autistic son Luke was placed in a group home.  Luke is 25 years old and needed more support than his parents could sustain.  I have shared past posts on my blog about Luke  and his life.   It is no small feat to navigate the Department of Social Services  in matters of mental challenges and neurological disabilities.

Psychosis Or Normalcy

 

Luke is calmed by the use of watching movies or listening to music with his headset. It works wonders when his autism seems to be making him upset. How many of us do not have autism and are relaxed by music?

(Disclaimer: Original post written 12/2012). When I was growing up, mental illness was shunned.  We did not talk about it in my household.  The first time I was exposed to the  mentally ill was when I visited my two aunts at their job. They were nurses in a mental hospital for chronic patients in Kentucky.  As a young girl of 17, I was immediately drawn into the strangeness of this new world. ( Today a person would not be allowed to visit like I was able).

A Mother’s Emotional Challenges Dealing With Her Autistic Son

Having an adult son with autism has hard and complicating challenges.  My first time hearing Luke’s diagnosis in 1994 made me numb.  It did not seem real.

Grow Up Problem

Ode to Diary Input on Valentine’s Day, 1999

Recently I read from an old journal of mine.  My diary depicted a smart gal with more positivity a person could muster.  There was no facebook, twitter, youtube, amazon or even google. There was just a lonely gal writing.

Problems are mixed up.  Some are easy to deal with.  Others are not.  The heavier the conflict, the more noticeable my frailties would come to light.

The Honesty Factor

There will never be just one way to explain any given topic. If that were so, we would all be robots.  The honesty factor can be in different colors, yet with the same truth. 

Last week all hell broke loose with an issue dear to my heart. I am unable to discuss it fully on my blog. You know it is big when I can not even come up with the words. 

How many times have you had a metaphor utilized by someone to translate what they are trying to communicate?  Ministers love them in their sermons to help us achieve to that “higher” level.  Even physicians pitch them to translate science. 

How many of us have heard evidence based lingo?  We all value the meaning behind what facts are known on any given subject. The question is do we need those  facts thrown at us without some thought? 

Transfer of information always brings to mind a childhood game of whispering in one friend’s ear and then another, etc until all have heard.  What comes out at the end is always a good laugh. 

What if the transfer of understanding  goes amok? Communication 101 in college  after all is more important than even I thought.  

I am always full of questions . I wonder. I think.  I wait .  I need some answers. Maybe you do too. I hear ya.  Is a miracle around the corner? I hope. 

Easy Out

No easy out- we must stop or we will crash!

 

We need to learn to let go.  We hold onto things way too long that needs to be released.  I decided recently I need to start judging.  Yep.  You heard right. Judge.

After carefully thinking through this, I am judging it all.  How you taste inside me?  What drew me to you?   Where this will take me?  It is true good or bad and now I am OK with judging.  Watch out.  I may prematurely put you to the test.