Category Archives: More Mental Health

Memory Loss

It’s inevitable . Don’t count yourself out. No one wins in this battle. 

She called me and voiced her concern. I said, “what’s the matter?”

“He asked me again how old I am.” Repeat.  Rewind.  Move forward.  It was the advice I gave. 


“Keep drinking your nightly glass of wine too!” That advice she liked. A lot . 

Memory issues are ever present in my own devised, messy life. As a brain tumor survivor,  I decided to do life as my will determines it to be. That can be complicated as well as simple. Never boring. 

Then there is my autistic son . He has real issues remembering everyday life sequences. I try to make life fun for him. It really helps. 

The problem I see with care takers is the isolation brought on by the inability to be out in society as much. My idea is we all need to help each other.  Forgiving those that are losing their memory also is probably not what a care provider or family member wants to hear, but it’s the only way one can be. 

For example, Caring for my son was days without sleep turning into countless years with sleep deprivation. My son turns 24 next week, 22 years I was the main provider. I had several helpers throughout the years and his dad was awesome, but most weighed heavy on my shoulders. 

Routine also needs to be kept constant. I did not realize it until my son was born. I am mostly a spontaneous person and do not care for everything being the same day in and day out.  Spontaneity was needed because my RN job caused me to have to document everything very closely by the clock. I sure did not want to do that with my personal life! 

Written in memory of those who lost their battle with dementia. 

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Heroes

Luke on the bus to school. Luke is cushioned with a head rest and back support because he has been known to injure himself without warning.

Luke on the bus to school. Luke is cushioned with a head rest and back support because he has been known to injure himself without warning.

Are there any heroes among us anymore that cause us to pause with amazement? Recently I shared the story of my step-dad Roy who is a hero for his military career as a WWII Prisoner of War. When I asked him what defines a hero? He would say something like this, “Our heroes are those we left. I am no hero. I guess I was just lucky. Those left on the battlefield are the amazing ones”. As we continued our conversation, we both agreed having heroes in your life is vital. What was discovered in the process is that a hero could be invisible.
To me the greatest heroes among us can be the ones we hardly notice. I have found that it is a good thing to find amazement in the smallest of things no matter the situation. For example, I have a son with Autism. Luke typically has more bad days than all around good ones. Yesterday Luke had one of his really good days. He was all smiles and so was I. It was a time of wonderstruck for me. He is my hero. He has taught me something about myself no one else can. He has taught me love and what it means to give it your all. Perhaps that is what we see in Roy as a POW VETERAN. He gave it his all and survived to tell his story for all those that had died. The respect we give to Roy is for a whole generation.
How do I say I can call my son Luke my hero? First, he is my son and I am proud of him no matter what the situation. Second, when we have a good day with Luke it tells me he is doing all he can to make it a good day for all of us. He is working his mind to will it for good thoughts when many times his mind is full of obsessiveness and torture. It is this Forgotten Power of Expectancy we all should be taking into our very being. I know deep down God is amazed at Luke. For unto to Him, He asked for us to come as children.. Luke is not visibly a hero like Roy, but in the quietness of our home my son is not forgotten. God sees us all the same. There is no difference to Him. Luke is working hard to be the best he can be. Thats hero enough for me.
PS: We have an ETSY store and you can click into it from the birdhouse photo. 10% will go to the Autism Society Charity if you purchase before February 14th! Also please follow up with your neurodevelopmental stories on http://www.facebook.com/alesiaandluke I am very interested in hearing about your story.