Author Archives: alesiablogs

About alesiablogs

I was a lifelong caregiver in major hospitals throughout the country spanning over 30 years. I am recently retired and finally writing now. My passions are wide with variety. I hope you will enjoy my take at life and join me as I express a variant in life you may have never encountered before.

Mental Health

Luke and mom on a very good day snowshoeing

 

If you read this, it will change your life…

Luke has a rather severe case of autism. It is coupled with Bipolar. He can rage at a moments notice.  If you are in his way, the chances of you getting physically hurt are high. 


I had just returned home from a trip to Hawaii ( yes I have a life) when I had my son over for a few nights.  While finishing supper with  Luke, he was his usual hyper self. What happened next was 5 hours of pure nightmare. 

Luke ran upstairs to his room and began hitting the back of his head into the wall. He has made several holes in the drywall, but it had been 5 years.  I caught only one bang of his head visually by the time I got to him.

While physically injuring himself, Luke was crying loudly and a hematoma was developing on his cranium.  I was able to ice his head, give him meds, and get him in a bath tub to calm down.  The pills kicked in, but the crying and other bad behaviors were persistent. Five hours later he was asleep from pure exhaustion. I did not sleep at all that night. 

You may wonder why I did not call 911. I want to tell you why. Here is what conversations took place from this incident. It was almost exact to what I had heard a few years ago when I reached out for help. One day I fear I will be unconscious and can not even make these calls. Luke did make me bleed. I am fine though:

1. I called the crisis hotline and left a message. That’s right I got a voicemail. 

2. I received a call in 30 minutes from a man who called himself a social worker who triaged the hotline. He said my son would be restrained if anyone came to my home. He put a referral in for me, although I said my son doesn’t need restraining.

3. The referral call came an hour later and she was a social worker too. She stated to me almost verbatim what the first man said. She added one bit of information by saying we have nothing good for adults with autism and our community is 20 years behind . 

4. I talked with Luke’s medicine management provider. He stated Luke was more than he could handle and refused to see him in his office the next day.  He said call 911. I believe this is a cop out by providers and lame. I wondered if his own child was like Luke- would that be his response ?

5. I spoke with a RN friend who works as a mental health nurse on the largest psych unit in Seattle . She knows Luke personally and said again to me: “Luke would be restrained. Please try not to bring him or call 911.”  She knew my pain and our predicament.  

6. I called Luke’s case manager and met with him. Luke is being placed back on a list for a special home. Will there ever be one found ? We have been down this road before and three homes refused to take him. 

Rewind :  Will society ever do what’s right  for folks as Luke? 

Luke is better right now, but I wanted all my readers to know we have a crisis in mental health. Again, will we ever get this right?  I will not call 911 for my son to be handcuffed. 

Living In A Bubble

A man chooses to walk out in a dangerous area of the North shore of Oahu.

I live in a bubble at times.  We all do.  It’s human nature.  Reflecting about my time in Hawaii makes me feel free in my spirit and safe. I love tropical climates. I am sure the fact I lived here for several years attributes to these feelings. In the above photo, I enjoyed viewing this man who seemed to feel free getting close to the waves. Water is peaceful even when we know it’s dangerous…


Stumbling along in this life is not what we were intended to do.  We have purpose.  When given the opportunity ,  I can feel music in my body and dance the night away. 

I have done that . Those nights of dancing  can be so much fun. I am in control and enjoy myself in the rhythm. Music can control the mind. I wonder how much fun this surfer was experiencing on his longboard as he allowed the waves to control him as he surfed the direction the ocean was taking him. 


Our mental state can take over our physical state.  For example, if we hurt ( brain talking to us) we may take a pill to help this brain state.  My chronic pain was so much better in the warm climate . 

Enjoying Hawaii is always a spiritual uplifting experience for me. Hawaii is a benchmark for me getting in touch with my spiritual self.


It’s amazing to me when folks argue that their conscious can not accept faith or theology. The idea of science enters the picture and is integral to mankind , but it can not explain my conscious state nor yours. It just can not know the subjective.


We human persons are more than the sum of our parts.  We have spirits that have the ability to think , feel, and can make conscious decisions. Respecting each other’s  life decisions may mean we need to climb out of our bubble once in awhile.  I know I do. Do you?  Living in pain chronically makes me think on spiritual ideals as this post conveys.  So much crisis and turmoil fill up our world these days. Sometimes removing our bubble can bring clarity.  

Credit: google and the others pictures were taken solely by Alesiablogs

Top Casualties

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The Atlanta Falcons football team surprised me losing to the New England Patriots in the super bowl. We witnessed one of the best comebacks in football history.  Maybe the lesson to be learned is we should never say a “patriot” will lose.

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Pearl Harbor-Few Words Needed

Pearl Harbor is not like any other museum experience.  One must prepare for this excursion.  I get up at 0530 in the morning in anticipation of getting free tickets.  Driving to Pearl from Waikiki is a half hour and I want to be sure to be there in time to stand in line to get tickets especially for my girlfriend who has never been.  Yes. FREE.  Tour guides ask for top dollar to take you to this site.  Tourism is high up as a way of making a living on the islands.  I think the price they ask is a bit high.  I was quoted $115/person.  I rented a car..

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Entering sacred waters toward the USS Arizona Memorial .  The ship is beneath the white structure  

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Shopping In Hawaii

Where in the World has Alesiablogs gone now?

My girlfriend caught me telling her, "No more pictures please!"  She laughted at this photo so I thought I better share.

My girlfriend caught me telling her, “No more pictures please!” She laughted at this photo so I thought I better share.

So I guess you know where I am at..right???????????????????????????????????????????????????????? Now to my blog post…..

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Can We Talk?

Can we talk about autism? Or better yet the impact of autism on an individual? My son Luke is now an adult. His disability affects him in many ways.

 

While on a fun trip downtown to Seattle, Luke always enjoys the sights and sounds surrounding him.  As his mom, I can notice when he feels overwhelmed. It is in those times we have to slow him down.


At home he will lay around, but it is not his usual. Luke likes pacing. I am sure this is genetic! His dad and brother do the same!  If we do not put the pause button on Luke, however, his brain will go into overdrive.  This causes him extreme stress. As family we notice this. Others will not recognize the symptoms as easily.


Luke’s care providers know this about him too, but it took a lot of training. Being a provider for Luke can hold special circumstances due to Luke’s strength. 


Can we talk about that strength of Luke’s?  I swear you would think he was the Incredible Hulk. He has broken so many things when he is upset. I decided long ago pretty things in my home weren’t important any longer ! 

Can you talk now and tell me – are you able to let go and not get upset if you lose every material possession you find precious to you ? I learned long ago I could. 

Gathering

img_4547The arts mean more to me in my 50’s than any other previous decade of my life thus far. It may have to do with the fact I did not have as much time to appreciate and embrace human creative skills and imagination.  I truly believe that the arts are meant to make us better people because of their beautiful and emotional power.

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