Category Archives: Blogging

Should Someone Ask You

Should someone ask you, “Who are you? Who are your parents, your grandparents, your great-grandparents?” Would you answer, “What’s in a name anyway? Is your name important to you? Did you ever struggle with your identity or search for your ancestors?”

Alesia at home in the photo taken 2021

Let me answer that your name makes you special, different from anyone else. It is our most important, unique identity which separate us from the crowd. The ancient of books declares every creature has an identity, even mankind. Where in our family tree could we be found generations yet to be, were it not for a name?

How unique we are, to pass on with not only our name, but parts of our personalities, idiosyncrasies and alas heritage. So shall we not expand our imaginations as we unfold our majestic closet of skeletons, or rather a colorful fantasy of generations.

We are all called to do something special in our lives and with our lives, something that no one else can do in quite the same way. People research their family trees for many reasons. Some are just curious, others have a deep interest in history; many trace there genealogy as a leisure hobby; but this research has expanded beyond fairytales of whom many were told a cover up story.

Should someone ask you who you are now after a DNA test, what would you say if you found out you are not who you were told for over a half century? As a huge history buff, looking back at Napoleonic times, we know he divided and conquered. Much upheaval occurred in those historical days and if he needed to make a kingdom, change names, and create order as he saw it, that is exactly what he would do. One such example he had power in his time was the Knightly Order. This potential to change peoples’ titles or names was something you would think only the kings of yesteryear could do, but in fact it is something that has been done since the beginning of time.

Who I am was chosen for me. It brought good along with rewards and regret of which I can not change. As it were, my vivid imagination allows me to peek in the window of the past to see what it may reveal of family I never knew. In today’s terms, ghost kingdom comes to mind thanks to the top series This Is Us.

So please indulge me as I describe my kingdom for a moment to you:

I dreamt I saw a huge gate where my unknown family was waiting for me. The only problem was the gate was on a high rocky plain that I would need to scale. So there I went climbing up with every ounce of strength I can muster. Getting to the gate and peering through grand window, I saw through. The spaces in front of me were of vast gardens waiting to be explored. I could also see multiple zig zags of trails to a majestic landscape where flowers were blooming as far as my eyes could see.

Stop. Reality Check.

I sat down before I really looked through the gate. I was not sure what the view was going to be. I realized I had a magical spell of my own doing placed on me and my imagination could take me anywhere.

Should someone ask you if you will go through that door, what would your answer be? Where do you find your satisfaction? Is it finding a prince in a kingdom in a beautiful garden or a man in prison looking downward in despair?

So many questions. Some answered . Some with no answer. If you do not mind me giving you a little advise before entering your Ghost Kingdom, think about changing your eye glass prescription. The view may look so much clearer, although that is if you have a good eye doctor.

To learn more about Alesia’s work in the field of knowing your genetic identity, mental health, and education please go to www.righttoknow.us and feel free to write her there if you need a referral or assistance in your own search for truth.

www.righttoknow..us

Cancer

Recently at my last appointment at the VA , I met this amazing character actor Arlen Dean Snyder from the film Heartbreak Ridge. Photo courtesy of IMDb.

The Today Show has one of my favorite weatherman Al Roker who was recently diagnosed with prostate cancer. As a familiar face on television, he has actively decided to educate the public and bring awareness. Mr. Roker’s doctor opted to do a biopsy. The pathology report showed an aggressive prostate cancer and he will need surgery.

Last November in 2019, I reported to my family physician with the VA a worrisome spot on my face under my eye. Being suspicious, I looked up the best surgical dermatologist in Seattle. In documented emails discussing back and forth almost begging my doctor , I requested this specialist. The only thing she offered was a picture taken of my face. In December of 2019 that photo of my skin lesion was read to be benign.

Again, I asked to have it taken off and I was made to feel like I wanted a face lift. This was very disturbing to me so I made a decision to go to a civilian surgeon. Unfortunately because of COVID, my surgery was not until July, 2020 and by this time the suspicious mole had grown four times its size since December of 2019. The good news was the specimen was taken to pathology to be read and I went home to heal.

For two months into the second week of September, I slowly mended. Never hearing from my doctor, I thought I dodged a bullet.  Starting to receive my bills for this surgery I called the billing offices. I mentioned to the billing personnel never being notified of my pathology report. She stated staff would call. Soon my phone rang and the nurse gives me the shocking news. “I am sorry to say your path report was scanned into your chart and it was missed. You have cancer.”

Shockingly I responded, “You are kidding me, right. How could you guys do this?”

As I hung up my phone, the anger was setting in as I had to go back to square one with the VA and get the doctor I originally requested. It has taken the VA system another two months to get me into this specialist and finally on Monday I will have an extensive surgical procedure to clean out the cancer and work on getting clear margins with plastic surgery if needed.

As a highly energized advocate for myself, but falling through the cracks at every turn has become like PTSD. Their were a number of doctors involved in my cluster of poor care and a VA system that is slow and not conducive to timeliness. I am not writing this to blame anyone as that is apparent there is enough blame to go around. Rather this should be looked at as a system’s failure along with physician’s fatigue syndrome ( lack of a better term).

I do not know if this is a volume and processing issue in the VA system keeping up with the soldiers’ care, but this was important for me to share with you as it is something that we can and should do better.

Think of me next Monday as I have more surgery and thanks to Al Roker for being public. It has given me some courage to do the same about my cancer. The wounds I have carried throughout my life are deep, but it does not mean I should not share with my readers. I need you guys ever more praying and sending healing thoughts.

Meeting the actor Arlen Dean Snyder at the VA was a lot of fun. This is a really nice guy.

 

 

 

If I Died Tomorrow

D506ACCE-7776-45BF-8ADD-31BC88DC848C

Monday would be a good day for gardening. The weather man convinced me of that. I bought plants at Costco Sunday evening and surprisingly it was a breeze shopping despite the COVID stock-up frenzy the past two weeks.  Driving  by earlier in the morning, a line went around the building with no end in sight. No one would believe what COVID has done.

Continue reading

How Did We Get Here?

March 3, 2020:

“How did we get here?” My mind wandering in disbelief as two men cough near by.

“COVID I will not panic, but you got my attention.”  Then another person sneezes.

My name shows up on the computer screen indicating my meds are ready.  Going to the window the distressed lady shouts out to me,

“Look at the spit all over my window.  We have two Coronavirus patients in the ER and my family just called me and said don’t come home.”

fullsizeoutput_4925

What is home anyway? Is it as safe as you think if you’re not invited any longer?

 

Continue reading

Berlin And The Hollow Tooth

Tip three:  Discuss Holiday ideas with those who live in the area.  That’s my uncle! Consider Rick Steves guidebooks for additional information .  I like his books.

93B29B59-7139-4982-A428-A1BC9ED8122DSitting in my Uncle Peter’s small, but efficient flat in the Charlottenburg borough of Berlin,  we studied very old photos. He lived within minutes of the largest surviving royal palace in Berlin actually called Charlottenburg.  Sharing these pictures brought him happiness yet also caused him such consternation.  He recalled as a boy how he and my mom ran to the castle for protection when the city was being bombed by the Russians.  While hiding and playing on the grounds, he did not comprehend WWII.

Continue reading

Berlin: Who Are You?

D9B4BAB5-024D-4FB5-8FC3-8BDC021C1BABThirty years ago Berlin’s wall came down.  I was working in Germany when that happened from 1989-1992.  After a nightshift at the military hospital, I went home to watch the news on the Armed Forces Network.  It seemed surreal to visualize the East Germans and many others excitedly chiseling the stone wall away!

On my recent trip to Berlin, it was with the wall in mind that I began another day exploring my mother’s hometown.   In my last post , I gave the tip to spend at least two days in the Mitte area.  Tip two is to look at Berlin through the eyes of history.

Continue reading

My Wellbeing

fullsizeoutput_514f  I just came home from my doctor appointment at the Seattle Cancer Care Alliance.  I have been in remission for quite some time from cancer, however, I am followed up for tumors in my right breast.  So far they are benign. My wellbeing is dependent upon consistently having checkups.  That story changed after I took a direct to consumer DNA test.  My life became a bit complicated…Maybe you will relate.  Come along for a story friends…..

Continue reading

I Stopped My World

fullsizeoutput_513a

My writing table evokes creativity. 

I stopped my world yesterday.  It was a simple thing.  First, I started my day cooking a meal for my autistic son.  Driving it to his apartment to the delight of his feasting eyes on homemade chicken tenders was so worth it.  Shortly a new job coach arrived to Luke’s home.  We are hoping to increase Luke’s structured employment or volunteer  hours in the community.  The meeting went well.

Continue reading

The Way Things Work

fullsizeoutput_896

I grew up an army brat: in other words, I was worldly enriched all over the planet with weather of all kinds.  Sunny days were my favorite with mild climate on Oahu which was a blessed adventure for me as a kid.  We were also stationed in Germany where snow was rare, but we did have it once in a blue moon.  In the distant traveling to Garmisch-Partenkirchen, you could see a vast eye-catching mountain range with trees trailing down the sides of those ever present high peaks.  What a sight to behold.  Obviously, my eyes have seen so much beauty.

Hawaii always helps me to gain balance and get me in the right frame of mind.  The way things work for me is to find equilibrium .  The continual ability to put something in steady position is so vital to me so as to not fall to totally out of stability.  As the ocean flows so my mind quietly does with the tides, robust at times and tame at others.  I close my eyes and abandon myself to deep thought listening to those gentle waves while crashing at even sequencing .  Oh what joy.

It does not surprise me that when I go for massage therapy, my music of choice is always the waves.  As so my fond memories of not that long ago stay with me in a small room for treating my chronic pain. Funny how we go back in time to find the peace we need for today.  Just food for thought for you and thanks for dropping by my friends.